Teenagers

The home has always been a quiet and peaceful place. Suddenly it has been invaded by some roman gladiators who are constantly declaring war on each other and on mommy and daddy!

The questions and the sighs are deafening; what has happened to the nice and quiet child who used to lap up every thing mommy and said as gospel and applaud everything they did as potentate. Not so any more. They question everything that is done and said. And when they do not get their way they slam their bedroom door behind them in a fit of temper as if daring any one to follow.

The challenges with teenagers is that that are in a state of confusion as they change from childhood to adulthood. A process that catapillers carry out with consummate ease. It might be easy for catapillers but not so easy for our young children.

This process should not be entirely surprising for us parents seeing it is something that we ourselves faced. Nevertheless the process never fails to surprise us. It is something that can be dealt with successfully if we are mentally prepared. The teenage years could be likened to an earthquake. Only a solid foundation could withstand such tremors.

That foundation must be put in place from infancy. For that foundation to be really solid a strong bond between parents and children must be built. That bond must be built on love and communication. Great pains must be taken to insert in the child’s heart proper moral values. It is quite unfortunate that live in an age where children are taught that if it feels good do it.

If you plan to live by yourself the rest of your life by yourself that’s fine but if you plan to live with someone else rules need to be put in place for one to have a successful relationship. It is not possible to have a successful relationship with anyone without rules. For adults to live comfortably with rules they need to learn that from infancy. They need to learn very early that if they will live on a hill by themselves rules are not necessary but if they intend to live as part of a group of two persons or more rules are needed. That appreciation for rule have to be developed early in life.

The first thing that children launch an attack on when they become teenagers is the regime of rules that confront them. They were so quiet and condescending accepting everything. Daddy used to be the superhero that nobody could beat and mommy was the reality star no lady could match. Not anymore. Daddy is now Humpty Dumpty who has fallen off the wall and mommy cannot now compete with all the little prince and princesses parading the neighborhood.

How can parents win in this battle for the minds of their children? As was noted before the foundation must be laid from childhood. An intense raport must be maintained between parents and children right up to puberty. There is no substitute for this. The mistake parents make is that they spend a lot of time working and providing material things for their children and neglecting other needs like their emotional needs and very important their spiritual needs. To be sure children will not be grateful. They will not forgive. you for your negligence. Attempting to polish up your blunder by calling it quality time will not do.